Biblical at Campaign 2019
New Kingdom Egyptian vs New Kingdom Egyptian
With two games under the belt, the Egyptians were looking forward to a slightly different challenge in the proper afternoon session.
As the middle class, middle England shoppers drifted past the third battle of the weekend saw the Loyalist Egyptians take the table yet again, this time against a Semi-Mythical Egyptian army (aka NKE but using some cool fantasy figures from Magister Militum instead of normal ones to represent the troops).
The lists for the New Kingdom Egyptian and New Kingdom Egyptian from this game, as well as all the other lists from the games at Campaign can be seen here in the L'Art de la Guerre Wiki.
The Great Drought had hit the upper reaches of the Nile, as no waterway or river graced this particular battlefield. Instead a patchwork of fields, plantations and other uneven spaces littered the playing surface in a vague bid to give pause for thought to any wheeled units in either army.
Yet again the Loyalists were slightly larger and wider, and lined up with both Warband commands on the right and centre with the more resilient and doughty Heavy Foot, spearmen and Chariotry command on the left.
The enemy, fresh from the underworld with their massive statue leader bases stretched across the table in a broken line of mostly drilled and well organised troops - a fascinating counterpoint to the unwashed and impetuous Loyalist Egyptians
The undead enemy army was indeed much smaller, and so the Loyalist warriors drove forward in a hopefully unstoppable tide in a keen effort to overlap and overrun the ends of the enemy line, following which a graceful inswinging turn would bring them crashing into the fox-headed underworld denizens on their rare once a millennium day out.
Mighty Mighty Bosstones
With bones a-jangling the undead skeletal Egyptian host jabbered and wailed in an unearthly keening as the Mighty Mighty Meshwesh and Maniac Sea Preachers of the Loyalist Egyptian force drew ever closer to them.
Death was in the air, and Death was on the tabletop leading a line of units of Medium Swordsmen with Impact as well - a busy afternoon for the old guy I guess?
As flesh met bone and as axe met spell the two armies got to grips violently in the centre of the table.
On the Loyalist right however the undead enemy had retreated away from a combat they clearly didn't feel confident about, leaving a vast open space in front of a vast number of utterly unoccupied bloodthirsty mercenary Sea People warriors who by now were wondering if they might have time to nip into John Lewis to pick up some new soft furnishings before they would be called upon to actually fight in this battle
Ya nhar eswed! The clash in the centre was resolving itself all too quickly though - both armies staggered into each other at pace, hurling spears and swinging swords with military efficiency and barbarian ferocity.
This was a battle of the better organisation and drill of the Undead army, against the madness and aggression of the Sea Peoples fighting in the pay of the Loyalists
And it was aggression and ferocity which was winning the day.
The first round of combat had gone the way of the Meswesh, and now as melee got to close quarters hacking and stabbing the enemy simply melted away like ghosts and spirits on a sunny afternoon, leaving huge gaps in the middle of the enemy line as a result.
With the snake-headed enemy left flank fast starting to run out of table into which to retreat the time had probably come for them to turn and make a stand.
This however was already seemingly too late, as the Sherden and Wishy Washy warriors of the Loyalist army were already starting to turn the flanks of the now-exposed Undead Egyptian centre. The risk to the Loyalists was obvious - if the retreating snake-head unit returned to the fray they could inflict terrible damage on the now broken-up Sea Peoples, but with the enemy army seemingly slipping fast to defeat this seemed a reasonable chance to take for a quick win opportunity.
Tutankhamun would have turned in his grave to see how the evil undead army was not short of a few tricks of its own, as it launched a series of magically inspired attacks on the opposite flank even as they themselves started to realise the risks of their current position.
Fuelled by the threat of an embarrassing wipeout the crocodile-headed warriors redoubled their efforts and smote mightily at the Loyalist holding forces on the left, hammering them with a series of punishing victories which drove the Loyalist forces immediately to the brink of a dramatic collapse
The Loyalists were running out of 2-hit yellow markers as the croc-headed opposition sliced, snapped and chewed their way forward with unbridled aggression.
The evil undead army was however not short of a few tricks of its own, and launched a series of terrifyingly efficient attacks. Even where the Loyalists were winning their troops were barely making it through the combats alive, rending any further aggression on their part a highly risky business indeed.
The undead tide was certainly turning fast now, as the previously withdrawn left wing command returned to the fray with a vengeance.
Clearly forewarned of the imminent return to combat of their colleagues the Evil Death Lord's Might Chariots had refused to lie down in the face of a fierce Loyalist flank attack and instead had held their own and then some - buying time for the returning troops to do untold damage against the baldy arranged and over confident Loyalists.
Everyone was fighting in all directions as the two lines blurred and merged together.
Croc-headed axemen fought at close quarters with feather wearing tribesmen from the shores of who knows where (but probably modern day Israel and Lebanon) as both armies faced innumerable risks with each and every combat possibly having severe repercussions for its neighbours.
By The Beard of The Pharaoh! Both armies had now settled into a seemingly mutually punishing exchange of blows, every hit delivered was responded to with a countervailing punishment beating dished out by the opposition.
Hits and casualties were lining up faster than dysentery sufferers outside the ships doctors cabin on a Nile cruise as both armies teetered towards destruction and defeat.
Everyone was surrounded, everyone was fighting like it was a Saturday night in Newport, not a sunny afternoon in Milton Keynes by the Nile.
With such a mess of melee it was almost impossible to see what the end result might be - but one block of Sea People Warriors had found a lateral solution to the impasse. They broke through the enemy line and made a dash for the opposition camp.
The undead were seemingly uncaring of the lives of their men (unsurprisingly perhaps) as they threw bodies and skeletons in the path of the baggage-hunting Loyalist mercenaries in a desperate attempt to halt their looting run.
Such a tactic has however its own risks, and even as the Loyalist mercenaries were halted in their quest for loot they were able to outnumber and overrun the blockers put up by the enemy, recording points anyway towards an enemy army break.
With both armies seemingly scattered to the four corners of the Sahara by desert winds, death claimed its final victims of the game - a slew of losses on both sides condemning both armies to a spectacularly traumatic and violent end in a mutual destruction!
The Result is a Mutual Destruction!
Click here for the report of the next game in this competition, or read on for the post match summaries from the Generals involved, as well as another episode of legendary expert analysis from Hannibal
Post Match Summary from the New Kingdom Egyptian Commander
Hmmm.. These undead troops were rather difficult to kill, which is I guess not entirely unsurprising, but even so I thought I had this battle well won long before I ended up not winning and indeed losing my own army.
The opportunity to attack boldy did mean the battle was fought close to the enemy camp, which was nice as it was lovely to look at, but also made it all too tempting for my men to try and break through and capture it when perhaps in retrospect they could have taken less risks and spent more effort to kill the enemy troops in the end phase of the battle.
Anyways, the rest of my team are still doing well so even with this rather more patchy record than I might like so far there is already a solid chance of a trophy on the horizon
Of course, once I get my hands on it I will spirit it away to my pyramid ready to be interred next to me when I eventually die. At which point I guess I will meet the opposing troops from this game yet again!
Hannibal's Post Match Analysis
You hapless oaf, thick in the head as if the desert dust has blown through your ears and lodged in your brain
Over confidence is a regular visitor to your battle planning, but here you developed it half way through the game and the proceeded to take far too many risks to try and bring it to a quick conclusion instead of finishing careffully to secure victory.
Why did you need to try to close out the game so speedily? Were there some soft furnishings in John Lewis you were keen to go and peruse? And did you not realise that they are also available online with free home delivery?
Quite what will happen in the next game is a mystery, but perhaps you will have learnt how to deal with Egyptian armies by then?
Click here for the report of the next game in this competition